Yesterday we traveled along the Norfolk Broads.
The fact that we did this is no big deal. The fact that someone was brave enough to hire us a boat is a huge thing!
Yes, we actually steered our own boat along the broads.
Neither myself, my other half, or my daughter have done anything like this before. But we thought we would give it a go, so off we went with the dogs for a morning on the river.
The first thing we learnt was that just because you can drive a car, doesn’t mean you can steer a boat.
As my fella swung us from side to side, narrowly missing passing swans, and totally deviating from the right hand side of the river, it became apparent that just maybe this hadn’t been such a good idea.
Deciding that she couldn’t do any worse, we allowed my teenage daughter to take the wheel.
There is nothing more sickening that a teenager who can do something, with great ease, that you found hard. The reason for this is because teenagers have a brain defect that allows them to think that they know everything. When something happens that proves they are correct, you can guarantee, that that section of the brain will go into overdrive and will be unable to talk of anything else for at least half an hour.
Simply to shut her up, I decided it was my turn to steer.
Let me start by saying, there are reasons why I don’t have a driving licence. I was petrified, something that wasn’t helped by the swans who seemed to be playing chicken with us.
It took a good ten minutes for me to stop shaking but when I finally did I realised I wasn’t too bad at this boat steering thing. In fact, I was so relaxed, I decided to try docking.
This wasn’t a good idea!
It’s a lot harder than it looks. You know how you see boats glide to a graceful stop on TV? My stop was nothing like that.
I crashed. Naturally my daughter had plenty to say about this. Being a teenager she could have done it so much better. My only saving grace was that, when we stopped again my fella did it and his attempt was so much worse!
He spun around at the dock proving he is just as bad at reversing a boat as he is a car. How he passed his test is beyond me but this did provide great entertainment to bystanders.
It was a good ten minutes before we were able to stagger from the boat. We stepped onto dry land with a great sense of achievement. We had officially driven a boat. It was scary and fun and wonderful all at the same time.
Now I just hope that next year we can find someone daft enough to hire us one for a whole day.